Here are some helpful tips for preparing a planned exit; REMEMBER you cannot control your abuser and you are not responsible for ending the violence but you can be aware of safety options that may assist you in the future:
Decide and plan where you will go if you have to leave home (even if you do not think you will need to). This should be a safe place from which you can call for further assistance.
Determine who would be able to let you stay with them or lend you some money.
Have a packed bag ready and keep it in a secret place that is easy to reach. Leave money, an extra set of keys, extra clothes and, if you can, copies of important documents with someone you trust.
Open a savings account in your own name to start to establish or increase your independence.
Keep the crisis line phone number close at hand or, better yet, memorize it. Keep some change or a calling card on you at all times for emergency phone calls.
Look for a safe computer at work, the library or a friend’s house where your Internet history can’t be viewed.
Use a code word or signal with family or friends when you need the police.
Review your safety plan as often as possible in order to plan the safest way to leave your abuser.
Important Documents to Have
All bank account numbers, credit union and 401(k) information
Extra key for the safe deposit box and info
Copies of car titles and past 3 years’ income tax returns
Deeds to joint or individual property
Copies of outstanding loans, amount of monthly payments
Joint and individual credit cards with balances. Get your name removed from joint cards if possible
Pay stubs for at least 2 months
Copies of your and the abuser’s signature cards at the bank, CDs and bonds
Copy of any Personal Protection Order (PPO)
Copies of all insurance policies, wills, trust fund or pension fund information
Abuser’s Social Security number, driver’s license number, work address and number; addresses and numbers of friends; criminal history; license plate number and recent pictures
Unless an attorney advises you not to, if you leave, take all personal assets and half of all joint assets (for example, bonds, checking account, credit card)
If your life or your children's life is in danger, DO NOT WAIT, start planning your escape before it's too late.